The Day All Spinsters Dread...

Is quickly approaching us. I've already had the "desperate" phone calls from the ex's who just didn't want to be alone, or at the very least, needed a "trophy" to show off tomorrow night. Of course, Chuck was the first caller. He used the "it's been awhile", line to try to get me to agree to a nice dinner and some dancing. Damn him. It's been so long since I've been to dinner and dancing. I must admit, I was tempted, even if it was Chuck. Don't worry, I declined. I had a couple of calls from some doctors I had dated briefly from the city a long time ago.

Tell me, why does Valentine's day bring out the most insecure, desperate emotions in so many people? It's just a day. That's it. A day. Society puts so much emphasis on Valentine's Day, that all of us singleton's are made to feel like shit because we're alone- even when it's by CHOICE. Sure, I could be with someone right now, but I'm CHOOSING to be alone. I'm choosing to pull a "Bridget Jones" tomorrow night by drinking a bottle of wine myself, smoking a pack of cigarettes and singing "All By Myself" in my sheep pajamas!

Sure, my ideal night would be going out and having a drink with Bobby, enjoying a few dances, just having a good time. Nothing more that what it is, we're friends. Bobby's one of my dearest friends, and one I miss terribly. Sure, there's still a flame burning deep inside for him, but it's held way down in the deepest crevice of my heart- it would take a lot to get that back to the surface again. So, for now, we are what we are. I know he's been buried in a case lately, so I'm sure even if I did pick up the phone to ask him for a drink, he wouldn't be able to pull himself away from the file long enough to have a good time, but who knows. I'm still seeing a "Bridget Jones" night in my future!