Once Again....

It's back to work... Thank God, I'm on 7am to 7pm now. So far, that's the only good news today has brought me. As I'm clocking in, and preparing to make my rounds, I'm confronted by the head nurse. She's requested a conference with me and the resident "shrink". Yep, I've been reported. Someone saw me crying on during my break on monday and felt as if I "might not be able to handle the high-stress situations we're faced with on the TF". I can handle it. I've handled it for nearly six years now. Why do think the nurses are rotated out of the wing each week or bi-weekly? We're human. We feel pain. We feel sorrow. We grieve, just like everyone else. Yes, I was close to Ms. Hodges. It did hurt when she died. Yes, I did grieve for her, but I'm ok. I'm here. I've not negelcted a single patient, not now, not ever. I'm a good nurse. Sharon knows that. Damn, I hate the "let's talk about our feelings", speech we get when our time in the TW is up. It's part of being a nurse I guess. I know I shouldn't have shown emotion around the hospital, but we all have our moments. Somethings things get the better of us, and that just happened to be one of those times.

Tonight- is definitely an "emergency" girls night out. I can't believe I'm hitting the bar twice in one week. I've never been much for the bar scene, but tonight, it's just fitting- especially when all you have to look forward to at home are four lonely walls and a spoiled cat. I want to celebrate life, the life I have. I don't want to dwell on work, or psychologists, or death, or anything- I just want to have some light-hearted fun. Maria's definitely up for it. Wish me luck, I'm gonna need it!